Part spite, and part truth has led me to hate A.J. Pierzynski more than any other baseball player on earth. He has a field presence like that of a fat 15 yr. old bully looking to get his dirty nose in any shit possible. Ontop of that, this bigot has recently bleached his gay hair blonde which solidifies his homosexuality. I hope a ray stings him in the heart like Steve Irwin.
On another note, I have discovered that riding a moped is the closest thing a human can ride in order to emulate a flying broom from Harry Potter. If Harry Potter came out of Diagon Alley right now, I would suggest riding a moped as a sub-par substitution for his electrifying Firebolt.